CALLED TO SERVE: Land on Me Little Moth!

LETTER 65 (9/4/16)

Such a fun week! We had a lot of fun and cool things happen this last week. Something happened the week before that I don't think I mentioned either so I will mention it now. The night of training calls, Elder Stevenson and I were out finding when we ran into two girls sitting outside their apartment in lawn chairs and five drunk guys just on the other side of the doorway. We started talking to them, and noticed the little baby sitting in one the girls' arms. They were like 17 and 19 year old girls probably in High School, so we asked, "Whose baby is that?" You can imagine our surprise when the 17 year old girl answers, "Mine!" Then one of the drunk guy comes out and stands just close enough to me that I can't smell anything but his very alcoholic breath and starts talking to us. Then another guy comes who doesn't say anything but points at us and then gives us a thumbs up and repeats this 5 or 6 times, to which the two girls laugh and the very drunk guy tells us that he can't speak. To put the frosting on the cake, the drunk man grabs both my cheeks and wiggles my face from side to side while he yells, "AWOOOGA, AWOOOGA, AWOOOGA!" Elder Stevenson and I didn't stay very long after that.

Anyway, my trainee Elder Dickson is the bomb and we are working hard to find some new solid investigators. We had some amazing miracles last week where one college student followed us on his motorscooter and told us he was looking for a church and another man who had met a member of our church from America that had come down to Hualien doing family history work. Crazy cool. We also got told in heavily-accented English by a man from India that we were wasting two years of our life because God can't create food.

One of my favorite parts of the week though was just two nights ago and yesterday morning. A moth flew into our bedroom, and me being me chased it all around the room trying to get it back outside and save it. After a minute or two of unsuccessful grabs and probably unnecessary yelling, in desperation I yelled out, "Land on me, little moth!" Almost immediately, the little moth landed on the front and middle of my shirt. I just about yelled again it was so immediate. I took it outside with a beaming face, and then came in so happy that I had garnered the title "Moth Whisperer".

The next day, however, I was studying a talk on meekness when I realized what parallels my little experience had with being meek. Many a time in our lives I feel like we are this moth--maybe we are searching for a lightbulb that distracts us from our real purpose, maybe we resist (either knowingly or unknowingly) the arms of a loving Savior, or maybe we are just lost in a room and we don't know how to get out. This moth discovered, as I think we all eventually need to discover, that the solution comes when we listen to the voice that says, "Land on me, little moth." The more fully we trust in that assuring voice, and the quicker we respond to that call, the faster we are delivered from those perils that loom before us. That, in essence, is what meekness is isn't it? Responding quickly and with trust to that loving call from our Heavenly Father to return to Him. I hope, as ever, to become more meek and humble like our Brother, Jesus Christ, and to more quickly change my will to better conform God's. I love you all, and I hope you have a wonderful week!

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So, training is really fun and I am totally enjoying it, but as Dad probably knows there are some difficult parts as well. Lately I've been trying to do what you said, Mom, and sort of identify what is causing me to be stressed. About half the days I am totally fine, and the other half I am extremely stressed out. I've found that it is generally towards the end of the week when I start getting really stressed--about the time that we do reporting. In our mission we just have these 'standards of excellence' that have been set apart as what will help us as missionaries baptize converts. President has promised us that if we stay in the green (i.e. hitting all the key indicators) that we will baptize. He also emphasizes that these are not quotas, but rather what every missionary is capable of achieving on a week to week basis. It all is pretty good and everything, but it is a huge source of stress to me. I try so hard to hit these key indicators, but I struggle so much. One week I will focus on lessons with members present and new investigators and then I will hit it, but there won't be any investigators at church or there won't be lots of baptismal date investigators. When I try to focus on both I just don't hit either. Sometimes I feel like I should just go back to the basics and just invite others to come unto Christ, but when I do I don't hit the standards of excellence. Those most frustrating part is that I don't know what to do to hit them all every single week. So I just fail over and over again and then get stressed every weekend when I have to hurry and do everything I can to get the rest of the key indicators. Lately it has just felt like the gospel in all its beauty and simplicity is completely separated from this missionary work that I am doing which is complicated and causes me unending stress. I'm not sure what I can do to bring the two together so that my missionary work is just a simple facet of the gospel that I can work hard at and be successful in. I want to hit these standards so bad and accomplish the vision President Jergensen has for us missionaries, but I just keep forgetting to do so many important things. I really am doing well other than that though, and I really do love these people and getting to work with them. My trainee is a spiritual giant and my language gets better every day. It's just this one little thing, so any suggestions would be so awesome.

I'm sending Mary's and Sarah's package today, hopefully it gets there in time. The post office was closed last week otherwise I would've been sure it would get there. My camera started working again so no problem there. A new bag might be sweet, but the one I'm using now works really well and I would just have to get rid of the bigger one maybe. I'm not really sure. The best option is probably something that can be eaten so as not to be stored in a bag, but other things I'm doing pretty good on. Sorry that wasn't very helpful... I just really miss chocolate shakes and Cafe Rio, but I don't think that comes in packages.